Keep on thinking beautiful; with thoughts we create the world.

There is no doubt that how a person thinks is who they may become. Perched in negative thoughts, we diminish our potential and the potential of others. Our thoughts, whether big or small, have the power to shape and define us. They impacts our ideals, our actions and our outcomes. They affect how we see and respond to the world. This may sound like a strange question but, "What does it take to keep on thinking "beautiful thoughts?" Well, I guess that we need to define "beautiful".

Things that bring delight to the senses, the heart and the mind are beautiful. That encompasses practically everything that we will see, hear, taste, touch or feel with our hearts. And through the lens of beautiful we will give greater value to all of those things. Giving value to those "beautiful" things will also mean that we will be more passionate about preserving those things which brings us such profound satisfaction and joy. Family, friends, nature, time alone, time with others, good health, great relationships, being the best we can be, for ourselves and others. The list goes on and on. There is no limit to how much "beautiful" we have all been given in our lives. Gratitude, now there's another thing to add to the list of beautiful!

Beautiful things deserve our attention. They deserve to be cultivated. Our thoughts need our attention too. We can give room to the beautiful, or, we can too often get caught giving far too much space to the negatives. What if? Why me? That's not fair! I don't like it when.... When will I...? Our thoughts have alot of power over us. The way that we feel will also inevitably affect those around us. We do not have to give room to negative thoughts. In fact, they must have permission to enter into our minds, and we're the ones that give it. If we have thoughts that seem to be entering in that don't serve us well, then we should consider re-visiting where they came from and how we can bid them farewell. What will that take? Perhaps we will need some time to sit down and examine ourselves more closely and honestly. We all need to do that from time to time.

How can we turn those thoughts into "beautiful"?. After all, beautiful can change the world. Beautiful will be the difference between feeling defeated and empowered. It will be the difference between believing that one person can make a difference. It will be the step that saves a relationship between a parent and a child or a husband and wife. Beautiful will help us to journey healthily through grief, sickness and the many realities of our broken world. Beautiful will give us the courage to stand for something or someone instead of falling for everything, or worse yet, doing nothing at all. Courage, hope, trust, determination and every other small bold step that we take hold are all truly beautiful.

Having beautiful thoughts just means that we choose what we put into our minds, how we will process it and how we will act on it. How many of us would like to live to our fullest potential, immersed in a profound sense that we matter and that our lives can make a difference to others? Think on those things that are beautiful. They will surely inspire you to transform your mind, your heart and your soul. The blessings that will follow will be far beyond your imagination. Now that's a beautiful thought!

The Gift

Christmas couldn’t have come sooner! I’ll never forget that morning. I don’t think that I had slept much the night before thinking about the gift that had been on my mind day and night for months. I sprung out of bed, ran down the stairs and headed straight to the living room. Then, I checked the other rooms in the house....no trace. As much as I was hoping that the gift would already be there, it wasn’t. It was too early. I’d have to wait.

The anticipation was unbearable. I paced throughout the house. I snuck behind the beige cotton curtains in our living room, taking every opportunity to see if the bearer of my gift had pulled into the driveway. No luck. I must have looked out that living room window a thousand times. My mother rustled around in the kitchen, preparing some food for our visitors. How could anyone think about food at a time like this? My gift was about to arrive! The hours went by and still, there was no sign of my gift. Every minute that passed seemed like hours. To an excited 8 year old, that’s a very long time!

Finally, the car pulled into the driveway. I was cleverly tucked in front of the curtain again to get the best possible view of my special gift. The driver got out. She then opened the passenger side back door of her car and there was my gift in full view! Wow! Far better than I had ever expected! I was now so over the top with excitement that I got completely tangled in the curtains. I took a deep breath as I heard a knock at the door. The moment that I had been waiting for had finally arrived.

You might think that my special day was Christmas, but it wasn’t. It was a bright, hot June morning, just before lunch. It was the day that my baby sister arrived! She was the gift that I had been waiting for. I had seen her in my mind a thousand times. I’d played with her in my dreams and we had become best friends, long before this day. I can’t even imagine how my mom and dad felt. They had waited so much longer. All that rustling in the kitchen had been my mom preparing lunch for my new 7 month old baby sister. I vividly remember every detail of that day. For one, I couldn’t take my eyes off her. She was just so beautiful with her piercing green eyes and fair complexion. She had short wispy hair and she smelled so good. In the kitchen, she clung tightly to my mom. She was quite serious and observant. I don’t recall any sounds coming from her lips. She simply watched and waited for each moment to unfold. She and I were so different. I had dark olive skin and dark brown eyes. She had those beautiful green eyes and light colored hair. But none of that really mattered to me. She was perfect and she was now part of our family. Most importantly, she was MY sister!

My mom must have sensed my curiosity and intense emotions. I will always cherish her next words to me, “Do you want to hold her? She wants to meet her big sister. Here, sit on the couch and I’ll put her on your lap” There she sat staring up at me with those mesmerizing eyes. In that moment, my heart melted and instantly fused with hers. That day was the beginning of a very beautiful relationship with my sister. We have always been best friends, journeying through all of life’s adventures together. We know each other better than anyone else. We have laughed together and cried together. We have shared our dreams, our hopes and our disappointments. We have held each other close and supported one another during very painful times. We have celebrated many joys. We may not have been born of the same parents, but we were gifted to the same family through adoption. God knew that I’d be anxiously awaiting my little sister that day. He had planned it all out. He knew every detail long before I had perched myself in the curtains with that un-contained excitement or dreamt of the day that I would hold my baby sister in my arms.

God is so very good. He is the giver of life, of love and of blessings beyond our comprehension. He is abounding in His gifts. Today, I look back fondly on my many memories and celebrate one of the greatest gifts that I’ve ever received in my life- the gift of my baby sister.

Expect Sunshine!

I woke up the other morning to a loud thundering rain on my roof. The sky was dark and the rain pelted down like ice chips on my windows. There wasn’t much in me that wanted to crawl out of my warm, cozy bed. But, I had to get up regardless of the rainy day that lay ahead. I went about my regular morning routine taking the occasional glance out the window to confirm my emotions. This was going to be a cold, dreary day. More than likely, I was going to feel unmotivated. As soon as I allowed the thoughts to enter my mind, the energy seemed to get sapped right out of me. Say it and you will be it.
When my 10 year old son came out of his room, he was dressed in his typical attire of camouflage pants and a green t-shirt. He went about his morning as usual until he came to the point where he was slipping his shoes on to run out for the bus. He got up and much to my surprise were his big black sunglasses. They weren’t in his pocket either. He was wearing them.
I did a bit of a double take out the window. YUP, it was still pouring rain. While I had been busy grabbing my umbrella, he had been looking for his sunglasses. “Josh, it’s raining out. Are you sure that you want to wear those sunglasses? I didn’t see any sunshine in the fore-cast for today.” To my surprise, he replied,” Mom, I know it’s raining. But the sun might come out, so I need my glasses.” It was interesting how strange it felt to have him standing there wearing those sunglasses. I paused for a while to think what my next words would be. I just couldn’t resist continuing the conversation. “Seriously though Josh - sunglasses?”
Now, I am a pretty flexible and laid back person. But, I had read the forecast just minutes before. There wasn’t a hint of sunshine in the day. Or at least that’s what I had heard and that’s precisely what I expected. My son Josh, on the other hand, expected sunshine in his day, regardless of the forecast or the obvious down pour outside. My 10 year old taught me a very valuable lesson that morning.
Why must we enter our days expecting rain, even if it’s all that we see with our eyes? Josh was believing for sunshine and his faith was clearly stronger than mine. Even though it didn’t really get sunny that day, the pouring rain lost a bit of its thunder in my mind. I saw it through Josh’s eyes - a rainy day full of possibilities. Or, should I say that I saw it through Josh’s sunglasses?
So, there’s a lesson for all of us. Come what may in your day, expect sunshine! Don’t let the rainy circumstances of your life keep you from seeing the possibilities. Live each moment with an expectation of goodness. Be grateful for all of your days - even the rainy ones.
And for the record, when Josh jumped off the bus that afternoon, he was still wearing his sunglasses. I love that boy! He brings sunshine to my day in more ways than one.

Looking back

Can you imagine what it would be like if you drove everyday looking through the rear view mirror? You might catch a good glimpse of where you'd been, but you sure wouldn't have much luck getting to where you're going. In fact, a steady drive looking solely through the rear view mirror would inevitably bring you to collision.

We do that in life too. We can spend alot of time looking back in our lives. In fact, we can do that so much, that we lose sight entirely of where we are going. The more time we spend looking back, the more likely we are to stay stuck there. And sadly enough, we can get quite comfortable in the familiar of the past. Of course, there are times when looking back has its positives. Just this week, our family reminisced over old pictures. As we looked at our boys, we couldn't believe how little they had once been and how much they have grown. We felt so thankful to God for all that He had brought us through in times of difficulty. We also remembered that we had a lot of fun times together. Memories can be great. They have the power to affirm lives well lived and love well given.

But, on the flip side of that same rear view mirror watching are the things that we look back on that end up serving more as a discouragement in our lives. We can perch ourselves on decisions poorly made, relationships gone wrong, expectations that went unmet, or just plain old life handing us unpleasant and even very painful moments. That kind of mirror watching can leave us disabled or even completely paralyzed in how we live our lives.

We can "look back" in our lives by focusing on things that seem to be holding us back. I've done that with my back injury. "Why did this happen? When will I be able to get back to normal activities? Why do I have to wait? Why have I had to give up certain things? And of course, I could think, "What if...?" But, I choose not to go there - it just isn't going to take me in any positive direction. That's the road of worry. Worry won't add a single moment to my life. If anything, it will make my rear view mirror even larger than it needs to be, filled completely with "me" and not one bit with any thought of rest of the world out there. That's what rear view mirror watching does. It has a way of making us the focus and centre of our lives. We weren't meant to live that way. We were meant to be "other" centred.

There's nothing wrong with looking back for the sake of recollecting good memories. There's nothing wrong with looking back on not-so-good memories either, as long as we can learn from those times and use them as a springboard into the future. Our journey in life can't be taken looking back. It's taken one step at a time...walking forward, anticipating, hoping, trusting, believing that greater things are ahead.

Use your rear view mirror only as needed, for occasional direction. But, keep your eyes on the road ahead of you. The best is yet to come!

Rain...bows

After having lived in BC for almost 21 years, I still complain about the rain. I didn’t even officially own an umbrella until a few years ago. Even then, it seemed that I was living in denial when the rain came. I’d leave my umbrella in the closet – never to be used. What’s with that?

For me, rainy days seem to bring out any negative thoughts that are floating around in my mind. If there’s any lack of motivation to surface…surface it will on rainy days. I’m not sure why that is. Maybe it’s the darkness of the clouds that veil the sunshine. Or maybe it’s the steady pour of water that feels like it takes away all possibility of leisure. (Although I have seen people walking and jogging in those downpours and it doesn’t seem to bother them – go figure!)

I have been known for making all kinds of excuses for not going out in the rain. Too cold, too wet, too dreary. According to whom? When I’m indoors, I catch myself saying, “What nasty weather, I can’t wait for it to be over!” Is it really that bad?

Then, I realize that God sometimes allows us to "feel" the weather of seasons for a reason. I've always seen rain as just that....plain ol' rain...wet, cold, dark clouds, limiting....kind of depressing. Here's how I think God sees it. Showers of mercy and grace, hope, cleansing, new life. Ok, so that's why BC is so green! I think that we need the rain to be reminded that God showers us with His constant love, mercy and grace every single day. He washes us off, giving us the opportunity to give Him our all - the struggles, the fears, the joys. But, what about the pouring part? God POURS His affections on us. Ok, the dark, ominous looking clouds? Well, I think that we may feel like we’re in the darkness, but we’re really all in the shadow of His hand. The cold? Maybe we’d be more inclined to “huddle up” with God if we actually felt the cold. His large embrace invites us into that warmth every single day. We just may not see it.

We may prefer the bright, warm intensity of the sun, but we need the rain too. We need to sit in the quite of an afternoon shower, with nothing to do. We need that stillness to “be” - with ourselves and with God. He so yearns for our time, our affections and our relationship. He blesses us when we give Him that undistracted time. That is pure sunshine! So, amidst the rainy days, there is sun in our lives. And when we combine the two, rain and sun, we get so much more. We get rainbows in our lives – bigger, brighter and more beautiful than we ever imagined!

Reluctant Russell

I'm getting to know a few people at the park now. They're regulars, I've figured out, taking their walks at the same time that I do in the morning. One of my favorite passersby is a little Jack Russell Terrier. I don't know his name yet, so I'll call him Russell....reluctant Russell. Russell has a very perky disposition. From afar, he looks like an adventure on 4 legs, taking each step with an enthusiastic bounce. But, as Russell approaches me, that all changes. He becomes very skittish and unsure of himself. He's curious to find out what I'm all about..so he steps toward me. The second I move toward him, he gets really nervous. He almost looks as though he's twitching. And if Russell could talk, then I'm sure that he'd be stuttering. Russell is a classic case of canine reluctance. I wonder where Russell's reluctance came from. Insecurity? Maybe carrying around a bad experience? Who knows? Maybe Russell just isn't as brave and adventurous as he looks. Or, maybe he's more bold and brave than he ever imagined, but just never takes the chance - kind of like people.

Our great fear is not that we lack the potential or ability to try new things (like Russell feels). That's what we think holds us back. If truth be told, I think that we fear the deep seated awareness that our potential is so great that we end up scaring ourselves. We get overwhelmed and overcome by the immensity of who we could be, if we allowed the steps to be taken. That sounds kind of conceited, but in reality, we all were born with God-given greatness. We simply need to exercise the faith and courage to step into it. We tend to immediately squelch ambition and desires with doubt, insecurities, excuses, worry, anxiety, disbelief, aversion, avoidance and sheer...reluctance. So, what's required to combat the reluctance? RISK! I'm not talking about life-threatening risks. The kind of risk that I'm talking about is risk of trusting, risk of being transparent and vulnerable, risk of attempting something out of our comfort zones. Risk is "birthed" out of reluctance. I say "birthed" since it involves starting small and slowly developing through prayerful self-examination, trial and error, and most importantly, steps of faith.

Have you ever had a time when you felt nudged to say or do or be something, but then quickly shut the door on the possibilities saying things like, " I could never..." or, "no one would ever..." or, "I don't know how to...." or "I don't have what it takes" Says who? Ok, back to Russell. I saw him a second time on my walk today and this time he paused, got ever so slightly closer, walked away from me, but then turned around to take another look. Russell was thinking about being a little braver. He was stepping out of his comfort zone with those little paws of his. The next time that I get one of those nudges to try something new, or to dream something big (or small), or just to believe that "I can" lead a God-driven adventure for my life, I'm going to think of "Reluctant Russell", who I have faith will one day stop to enjoy our new friendship.

People watching

Ever gone somewhere and just "watched" people? There's a great experience to be had in being a spectator of life. The other day I was on my walk and really took time to look at the people around me. Usually, I walk a pretty fast pace (to get mycirculation going) while saying "hello" to everyone that walks past. I like to be friendly - to acknowledge people by sharing a smile. But the other day was different. I saw a real variety of people and couldn't help but wonder what was going on in their worlds.

I guess that this all many started years back as I experienced a lot of life's difficulties and challenges. The death of my father due to a brain tumor, miscarriages, a premature son, a car accident, depression, several surgeries, the tragic loss of my brother-in-law, the death of my mother, my travels to the slums of Ethiopia. There are more - but that's enough to list for now. Now, I'm not claiming to have suffered hardships more than anyone else, I'm just keenly aware that my pain and circumstances have alerted me to the reality of others' lives. So, when I took that walk that day, I looked at everyone with a very different lens. Every day I'm being intentional about noticing everything that God puts in my path - whether it be on a walk or just through the course of my day.

What about the woman with the limp? She walked slowly, carefully and very sullenly? What burdens was she carrying that day? what about the old man with the dog? Was he a widower? Was he lonely? What about the young pregnant woman pushing a stroller with her toddler in it? Was she coping ok? And then there was the older couple....hand in hand. Their affection for each other was so obvious, such a breath of joy. It made me smile. What about the 2 older women that I see regularly taking their walk? They look like good friends. Ah, the joy of our friends. Even when we can't take a walk with our friends in the park, do we journey well with them through life? I know what you're thinking....that's alot to think about on a walk! I'm not saying that our walks should be like case studies. I just think that it's worth making time to step out of ourselves a little by noticing others. It's a great habit to get into. Just notice and let you heart direct your next steps. Is there a lesson for you in what you see? Does what you see remind you of someone in a certain situation? Hey, maybe its even you!

Love, compassion, understanding, lessons to be learned....there's alot to be gained when you really take a close look around you. Never get so busy or pre-occupied that you don't take the time to be a spectator of life. There's more wisdom there than meets the eye.

Going for a walk

I don't know why, but I've never really seen walking as something that I would overly enjoy. Maybe that stemmed from the fact that I never seemed to have time to take a walk. Or maybe, truth be told, I never made time to take a walk, so that I could fully understand how very essential it was to my health - physically, mentally and spiritually. Perhaps I had this silly notion that taking the time to go for a walk meant that I was indulging with my time. After all, there are plenty of "productive" things that a mom of 4 boys could be doing. When I left work and began putting a plan together to recover from my back injury, I was told time and time again that the best kind of exercise would be taking a walk. As simple as it seemed, I initially found all the reasons in the world not to go. "It's too cold, it's raining, it's too early, it's too late" Finally, one day, as ridiculous as it sounds, I took the big plunge, and went for a walk at our neighborhood Fishtrap Creek.

The air was crisp and invigorating. Every step that I took introduced me to new sights and smells that were hidden from my senses with my busy schedule. I realized that I had become so busy in my life that I had missed out on these very simple pleasures. The more walks that I took, the more I wanted to take. My eyes began to look for more of nature's treasures....birds fluttering their wings on the water, beavers gnawing on trees, squirrels scurrying about foraging for food, leaves tussling in the wind, the sun glaring in my eyes, bathing me with its warmth. I began to realize that nature had wisdom to offer, especially as we observe the quiteness and patience of it all. Nothing in nature rushes along. Creatures do not fret over where their food will come from. Plants dried by the winter's cold always come to life in the spring. In nature, there is no sense of being driven or of worrying about anything. Our lives, on the other hand are another matter. I guess we could learn a thing or two but just putting ourselves in nature more often.

As I continued to take my walks, I also realized how very strange it felt to be alone, with nothing to do but examine my thoughts. It's almost as though my mind wanted to rush out of itself into the busyness that I had left when I walked into the park. I then decided that this discomfort that I was feeling was something that I needed to overcome. How could I possibly feel uncomfortable with peace and quiet? So, I began to take more walks and put myself in those quiet places more often. It was in the quietness, I found, that a wonderful calm and peace began to wash over me, the more I engaged it. I decided to take the time to pray and to ask God where He wanted to direct my thoughts. I can't believe how much I have grown to love my walks and my time alone with God. There is nothing in my mind or heart that I can't put before Him, and there is never a time when He doesn't show up when I call.

I guess that goes back to the saying, "never say never" I never thought that a walk could soothe my soul in the ways that it has. And so, now I look forward to those walks. I don't make excuses for not going, I don't feel guilty for making the time to be good to myself and I always stop to take a glimpse of the sheer beauty of God's incredible creation. Life should never be too busy to go for a walk. Everyone could use of little peace and quiet for the soul. The next step is to take what we learn from those quiet moments at the park...and apply them to living our every day moments, at home.

ONE heart

Today, I read a post on facebook that really caught my eye.
We were given:
Two hands to hold.
Two legs to walk.
Two eyes to see.
Two ears to listen.
But why only one heart?
Because the other was given to someone else.
For us to find.

I don't know who said this, but this truly expresses the beauty of reaching beyond ourselves to others. Life really is not about us. We do occasionally, or even more than occasionally make it out to be the life revolves entirely around what is going on in our small world: our need for security, our comforts, our happiness, our accomplishments, our fears, our disappointments, etc. We can spend spend so much time camped out in self pre-occupation that we forget to step back and glimpse into the life of others.

We can also spend alot of time managing our time. We're pretty good at juggling a countless amount of activities and "must do" events. In the process, we can strip away any possibility of engaging the world around us by being too busy. At times, busyness looks to be an attractive invitation. After all, there are so many good things to do. But, a good friend of mine once told me. "Everything can appear good. But, there are things that are better, and then ultimately BEST. So, we must be careful to weigh what stands before us.....a more balanced life equals more opportunities to notice people and circumstances around us. Remember, good, better, best!

And then there's mind management...the ever present reality of needing to manage our thoughts. Every day we entertain good thoughts and "not so good" thoughts. Comparing ourselves to others, perfectionism, lack of self confidence, contemplating the "should haves" of life. In general, giving too much space to thoughts, attitudes and ideas that keep us unhealthy (fears, worries, etc) can and will cloud our minds entirely. You know how that feels - like your mind is in fog. Or maybe some days, your mind has been in a sheer tornado of discouragement! We can become so absorbed in our unhealthy thoughts that we can (and will) become completely ineffective in noticing or reaching out to others. The ones who pay the price are the ones we love the most, as well as the ones we wish we could have noticed.

And so, this goes back to the quote above. We were given ONE heart so that we can go beyond ourselves. How can we reach out with love, compassion, strength of character, mercy and grace, if we are stuck in our own "stuff". We owe it to ourselves, our families, our friends and the rest of the world to clear our minds, clear our schedules, spend time with God allowing Him to minister deeply to us in the ways that we need to make some changes. Then, and only then, as we examine our minds and our hearts, will we be able to make the BEST use of that ONE heart that He gave us.

Hanging of for "dear,"safe" life?

Life is not always comfortable. As much as we would love it to be that way, it just isn't. The popular world view is that we can take control of our life, and direct it however we choose. But the fact is, that our lives are not directed by our plans. And if we've experienced hardships, we can be particularly tempted to retreat into a variety of emotional disconnects. We can run away from pain and discomforts, we can hide from them, or we can pretend that we've got everything under control...not even feeling a need to take notice of the world around us. That's called complacency and it is the affliction of our current generation. And then, if something comes along to challenges us, that perhaps asks us to reach beyond our comfort zone, it's just so easy for us to say, "That's not for me"...."I'd like to live my life within my own parameters....safely, comfortably, with no pain. Don't ask me to go there." Again, life is not like that. I remember going to Korah, Ethiopia, the leper colony of 130,000 last April. I walked into the world of mind boggling destitution, HIV, TB, leprosy, filth. It was unbelievably overwhelming. And there might have been a part of me that could have chosen to stay "safe" and not even go in, or not to look as closely. Or perhaps, I could have looked closely, but not allowed things to grip my heart. I could have chosen to be a "visitor" and then walk away back into my comfortable world. I could have said, "Boy, that was utterly horrible, but it's just so much bigger than me...there's nothing I can do." We can't walk through life like that. And it doesn't have to be out of the example of walking through an African slum. It can be right in our own family, our own neighborhood, in the midst of our own personal struggles. We can't go through life, just "hanging on for dear life" and not engaging what we see, hear and feel. Even in our struggles, especially in our struggles, is the opportunity to grow, to change, and to see the world through God's eyes. We have the incredible opportunity, as we leap out beyond ourselves, to reach out to others in a very profound way. We will have done it by letting go of ourselves, even in our most difficult situations, and made the decision to take our life, put it out there and make our worlds a better place. Watch this video below. This is exactly how we can live our lives...."hanging on for "dear safe life", behind the disguise of safety and comfort. And if we think that this is truly living, then we have a few things to think about.

A Journey.....

A few years ago, I came to a simple realization. Life is a journey. It took me until I was about 36 to realize that life was not composed of events that led me to a destination. Life was not going to be as I had planned it either. Life was not so much about where I would arrive in life, "my destination", but rather all about what was in my path to get there, "the journey"and how I would see it. And so, along the way, I've grown and changed....alot! Some of the changing I did quite willingly and alot of it I fought every step of the way. But through it all, my adversities became my greatest strengths. I learned to gleen wisdom and discernment. Out of my joys I learned to live life well. Out of my deep pain and sorrows, I learned compassion. Basically, the things that happen in our life shape us and mold us....if we allow them. And once we've realized that we are not the authors of our own stories, that's when the journey really begins.

I believe that life is not a journey that is meant to be travelled alone. We need people, we need eachother. It's not a weakness to need others, it's a strength. Join me as I share in my everyday moments,reflecting also on past steps taken. My hope is that you will be encouraged and inspired to walk the journey well....with eyes and hearts wide open.